Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Kiss My Tiara

I'm guilty. I'm guilty of doing the "Well I'm not REALLY a feminist but..." thing.

I don't want to be radical or be perceived as man-hating. I want to sit comfortably in my liberal feminism and while secretly resenting society, wear high heels and lipstick.

But sometimes I can't sit comfortably. Facebook yesterday was advertising a special series of episodes that the soap opera "One Life to Live" is doing. It's called "Prom Night the Musical" and normally I wouldn't have given it a second look but I was bored.

Now, I'm pissed.
I'm sorry but when did "bitch" become an acceptable word to use on daytime television? And since when is it an acceptable word to describe a female in general? Man I sound old and conservative, but why do we women put up with this crap? By allowing that sort of language to become acceptable and commonplace, we're allowing discrimination and subjugation to become commonplace as well.

We haven't "reclaimed it". It's like we're trying to be in on the joke, laughing along with those who would portray us as "other"...*grumble grumble grumble*

Now I'm watching Oprah and middle-aged women are learning how to strip. Oh how glamorous! I'm all for women feeling sexy in their own bodies, for enjoying sex and having healthy sexual relationships with men, but why are we glorifying a profession that does nothing but objectify? What's next? How to have sex like a prostitute?

Ugh. I'm off my soap-box. There's not much I can do from here. I can't wait to get to camp in July, to have time with all those 8th grade girls and to let them know that they are perfect the way they are...that they don't need to give into societal pressure like this. That we females need to work together and support each other instead of calling each other "bitch" and "whore".

I'm going to go burn my bra.

(Click on the picture below to see a bigger version...it made me stop and think for a minute. I'd love to hear your thoughts.)

3 comments:

Mark said...

Oh snap. I'm a hypocrite! Growth and change are good, though. I think maybe there is a way to reconcile heaven and the present moment, all things considered. Perhaps we need to be mindful of the direction we're headed in and the person we're becoming, but we need to be focused on this very moment. It is the only time when we can act.

I think the point I was trying to make was more directed towards good deeds. We can't do good deeds with the focus being on getting into heaven. I should probably get out my bible and try to justify myself, huh? Doesn't it kinda seem backwards to be doing good deeds without being excited about the good deed itself, just excited about the eternal ramifications of that deed?

I think what I meant by "being okay alone for eternity" is that I need to be completely okay with myself before I can embark on an eternity with another person. I stand behind that, and even though I'm still growing, I feel like I'm pretty happy with who I am. The fact that I'm still growing is itself what makes me happy with who I am.

I'll call you later and we can talk about feminism over a beer or two. Sounds like fun to me.

Themindtaker said...

Isn't stripping empowering? Isn't claiming your sexuality as your own to do with as you please what women fought for in the 2nd and perhaps even 1st waves of feminism? ;)

...To be honest, I didn't believe in about 45% of the points I made with that documentary I did last year, but I don't regret showing it to you because, well, you know...

I'm just playing the devil's advocate here. Of course, I think we've established that I'm more of a feminist than you are. (I challenge you to recall even one instance of my using the word "bitch" or "whore" in the 6 or so years you've known me.)

stephanie said...

feminism now a days is so drastically different from where it was. let me rephrase- the concept and perception of feminism now a days is so drastically different from where it was.

the fight has changed. it used to be that women were fighting for the right to work in the same fields and be treated equally and not be shoved into the stereotype of the "housewife." now, women who are not in the working world and prefer to be the homemakers and mothers are almost looked down upon. i think the whole idea has completely been made askew. the point of feminism (to me) is to be a strong person, be your own person, and to not be forced into something simply because of what you have between your legs. the sad thing is who is making the issue of all of these various choices? oh, it'd be other women, thus, they are in the end pretty much contradicting what their original stance was, and that's to allow women to be their own person and not be pegged into one position, whether it be career girl, mother, housewife, or some combintation or creation of their own.

as far as the stripping is concerned, i almost deem it the most powerful way a woman can use her sexuality. sure, the performer is being objectified by the men who are watching, i'm not going to argue that point, but by no means are the men the ones in charge. the girl on stage has the audience mesmerized and completely under her control. it's a wonderful way to reclaim the power of female sexuality. whereas women are generally deemed the "submissive" this puts women in the place of power. and yes, i realize that statement was a bit redundant.

now, for the wonderful new world of accepted language on television. i agree on the being completely caught off guard when i first heard it uttered on day time tv, but for a completely different reason. i think it's just plain inappropriate. although i realize it's completely naive to think that kids aren't going to hear that sort of language (or worse) in the real world, it doesn't mean it needs to be broadcast for the young ears to hear. then again, i hate it when things are unecessarily censored (there's nothing that irks me more than seeing a production that has been "cleaned up" for censoring sake) but television is a more accesible form of media.

as far as the particular word in question, i personally have no qualms with it. what once used to be considered a fairly crass comment and part of language has now turned into nearly every day slang. it doesn't have the same meaning it used to. well, it does, but it also has other meanings. of course, if said with malice it is quite an offending term, but anything said with the means to hurt is offensive. i'll be the first to admit that yes, i use it, but it's more often than not in a completely sarcastic tone.

i still strongly believe that there will never be an end to segregation, discrimination, subjucation, etc. simply because people won't let there be. there will always be someone saying that one way is wrong and one way is right.